As of now, I feel less pain thank God or luck or anybody/everybody. A molar the 2nd behind the canine on my bottom right hand side chipped for the first time 2 weeks after Danny was born. I naturally freaked out. I went to a dentist. They said not to pull them out but to fix them was so ridiculous that well that was out of my hands.
A few years back, the same on my left hand side started doing the same thing. This time knowing what the dentist would say, I didn't go. I don't have much work. I make about 100 a month sometimes more on a lucky month for with that I can't afford much.
The right one most of it fell off a few weeks ago but of course have more of the root and I think it's pushing more on my gums that it hurts sometimes. Goodness does it suck not being able to afford even necessity stuff. And, for like 3 weeks now I had been suffering with the half crown I had left in the left one. it started hurting so bad, I couldn't eat. I did, though, and it sucked and it hurt and god it wouldn't go away. I didn't take pain medication, something ever helped so why... And Sunday I had a small sigh of relief when I moved it and it fell out. Of course the room that borders is still in there but it doesn't hurt as much. I guess it sucks. But, what can you do when there is nothing you can do. Sometimes I wonder how people but then I get depressed so I stop.
Obviously people have work and their jobs have insurance so that definitely helps. I, myself, can't even find typical work and if I do it probably don't cover jack shit so you can imagine what a freaking degree that I can't use because it's confiscated will do for me. NOTHING!!! Yup... I sometimes feel like a nothing because of everything I have accomplished since I finished at a private university. It just makes me feel like the poor it they're not above (even just a little) poverty level then they can't succeed. Back in the day it felt because we were in poverty level they gave us cuts and thank god for those few helps but look at me now.
I hate it that I'm 28, with a son, no steady job, no insurance of any kind, I'm losing some of my molars, I need to get s physical and get my self checked because sometimes all these symptoms I get are not normal.
I know I can always complain about how shitty life is and how family can talk smack because I have a degree and doing jack shit but ultimately I'm still alive, my son is content and he has what he needs what else can I ask for. so my teeth are falling and I can't eat well and I chew slowly, so I don't get infections. We all go through that, right? Right?!! RIGHT?!?!?!?!
One day, I'll have enough to be okay, at least that's what I pray for. A small break. A job so I can get what I need and not have to somehow find money when clothes are rip. I need to work in order for this to happen. I need a job to even start thinking about getting married. You can't do that leap until you're okay with a budget. And most importantly I need all my loans and paid off so I can go back to school and get something that will help me get a job. Then and only then will my teeth be okay, will my health be okay, will my son have an opportunity for a future in college, and I will have the opportunity for happiness to contribute even more as I should and not seem like a needy person like the whole worlds sees us. I'm not. All I want is a job. Everything else can be easily fixed by that. I'm serious!
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